Running to Stand Still

Where am I trying to go?

Is there a place I think I will stay once I arrive there?

Do I enjoy the process of “getting there”?

So many times on my drive to work, I just want to stop and admire the view. I imagine how pleasant it would be to simply slow down, to be a passenger in a horse-drawn carriage instead of hurrying in a car to be here, doing this.

I bet a lot of my satisfaction in writing comes from capturing an experience that I failed to fully appreciate in the moment. I’m trying to strike an echo of the original thrill, a fleeting substitute for the real thing.

We pretend it’s so hard to live in the moment, when actually that’s our only option.

So… I need to settle into this moment.

I spend a lot of time thinking about what I should think about next.

Did I forget to do something?

Is there a new idea I wanted to explore, but didn’t write down?

In what ways can I improve?

I need to remember two things in these moments:

1. Right now, you are doing exactly what you should be.
2. All you can do in any given moment is attend to the world in front of you.

I can’t fix everything. There is no perfect trajectory to adhere to. I have control over so little — even most of what I “do” is really just happening.

It is not lazy or self-indulgent to pause, to sit in silence and smile. There are a million reasons to appreciate this moment, this unique position in the universe. Awe is not a luxury — let it be your default setting.